If guys don't make passes at gals who wear glasses, I'll be just fine with my new silicone BFFs.

Worst. Christmas. Ever.

What a find this green gunk is!

I have no explanation for this.

Lots of fun doing this parody of Netflix's Chef's Table for Scary Mommy in association with Kroger! The original video lives here on Scary Mommy's Facebook page.

I seem to be dressed as Don Johnson as Sonny Crockett in Miami Vice in this clip from Jimmy Kimmel Live.

Crazy much?